The Magic Weapons chapter 1: The Rider

here is the first chapter of a story I wrote         
                                 chapter 1: The Rider

Once in a land far away and in the city of Efole there lived a family of four. Mr. Shander [Drafin], Mrs. Shander [Goldenflower], ten year old Ander, and nine year old Sheldla. Now is the first book of The Magic Weapons.

Father what are you doing? asked Ander. I am writing a book said Drafin. wow I am going to tell Sheldla Ander said. Sheldla!!! Fathers writing a book. wow cool she said. lets ask Father if we can go on a picnic said Ander. ok Sheldla said. father can we go on a picnic today asked Ander. well okay but we have to clean the carriage first. yay Sheldla and Ander yelled together. Goldenflower may you please pack a lunch for our picnic? asked Drafin. okay said Goldenflower.

latter when they were at the field Ander and Sheldla played wile Goldenflower and Drafin got lunch ready. when lunch was ready Drafin could not find the children. Ander! Sheldla! were are you! he called. Then he herd a little voice Father! Father! were down here! They were in a hole Drafin got a rope and got them out. are you okay he asked? ya we were racing and Sheldla fell in and I tried to pull her up but I fell in to Ander explained. what's that noise asked Goldenflower? there was a faint clip clop clip clop it sounded like a horse galloping it got louder and louder until they could see a horse but it had no rider. look out yelled Goldenflower. when the horse came to a halt Drafin looked in the saddle bag and found a map with a squiggly line down the middle, and a note the note said

                 
                    Fallow the line on the map
                    I need help in two weeks
                   please come soon signed ~~~~~   

 What happened to the note Mother? asked Ander.  I don't know Ander, answered Goldenflower.
Well we better get back home, said Drafin. What about our picnic? wined Sheldla. I have to get ready for my trip, Drafin explained. Later at the house Goldenflower packed Drafin's clothes, food, and a gift for the one who needed help. Drafin got his sword, and knives ready. When he was leaving Goldenflower gave him his pack and  he said his good bye's and galloped away. Later when he was riding he heard another set of hoofs, he looked behind him and saw another horse with a rider cloked  in brown. It was to short to be a human what could he be. Drafin tried to gallop away but he fell of his horse and got knocked out. when he woke up he saw a figure looking down at him. hi I am Rolver son of Queen Rovay from the clan of the windowlo. And who are you may I ask. I am Drafin son of Sarah from the clan of Tim... which is my Father. and what are you doing In the wiled? asked Rolver. well I have to fallow a map and I don't know why. Well I believe we are on the same quest. said Rolver, lets camp for the night. okay agreed Drafin.